The Unholy Trinity by Man in a Hat

As James Gannon continues to revive the fortunes of Stockport County on the pitch, I’m delighted to advise that at long last, Man in a Hat is also back off it!

Missing in Action?

Last sighted over 2 years ago in the Cutter Inn in Ely, on my way back from a 3 night stay in Lowestoft    http://hedgegrower.blogspot.co.uk/2015/03/end-of-season-carnage-lowestoft-by-man.html

, I should perhaps explain?

No way, you’re not the boss of me! I don’t have to explain myself to the likes of you!

However, I will explain why a destination with such obvious stay-over potential as Gainsborough has been overlooked for so long.

Back in January 2015, County played Gainsborough & Boston in consecutive away games. There is only so much playing out my fragile aging frame can manage these days, & the baby-sitters have limits as to how much cover they can provide.

So I had to choose. Boston it was.

The trip wasn’t the greatest  http://hedgegrower.blogspot.co.uk/2015/01/boston-with-pride-by-man-in-hat.html                                  . I even titled the report “Boston Zzzz Party”, mainly down to the lack of variety of real ale. In fact, the beer was so boring, we left Boston earlier than planned on the Sunday, stopping off at Sleaford & Nottingham instead, en-route back to Stockport.

Ever since then, Gainsborough has been like an itch waiting to be scratched.  

Why Stay Over?

Gainsborough has much to offer.

Three Good Beer Guide pubs (the unholy trinity); the Elm Cottage; the Eight Jolly Brewers & the Blues Club. Hell, the Blues Club is actually at the Northolme (sorry, I mean the Gainsborough Martin & Co. Arena), so what could be better?

Even the local Wetherspoons is in the Good Beer Guide! The Sweyn Forkbeard is named after a Viking of some renown. 

Sweyn !

Back in early July 1013, Sweyn & his son Canute (yep, same one), defeated the local Anglo-Saxons, led by King Ethelred, & took over Gainsborough intent on making it the capital of Mercia.

Ethelred( allegedly he was  unready)

However, Sweyn died about a month later after being thrown from his horse. Hence, Gainsborough is sometimes referred to as the “capital that never was”.

In addition, there is another real ale boozer called the White Hart Hotel, where you can crash down for the night. Furthermore, this welcoming hostelry is less than 5 minutes walk from Gainsborough Central train station (assuming you walk in the right direction!) & also less than 5 minutes walk from the football ground. 

The White Hart

Not enough for 2 nights, but certainly enough to justify staying over Saturday night.

The Cunning Plan

Considering the train journey is just over 2 hours, it does take some planning.

Don’t ask me why, but Gainsborough has 2 train stations, Gainsborough Central (near the ground & the hotel) & Gainsborough Lea Road. Further, the first train out of Dodge on Sunday seems to be about half past 3 & goes from Lea Road.

So the plan is to get the 10:54 from Stockport on Saturday morning to Gainsborough Central (hopefully from the only Platform 0 in the world)....

 

The one and ONLY Platform 0

................& return on the 15:36 from Lea Road on Sunday, a good 20 minute walk, albeit via another pub worth checking out called the Trent Port on the banks of the River Trent.

Trent Port.

One potential problem is that you have to change at Sheffield both going out & coming back, a tempting diversion if ever there was one.

Aside from my usual Man in a Hat duties, i.e. getting plenty of pictures of you lot, researching the ale & pie testing, I’ll also be investigating the demise of Smiffy’s, the last wig maker in the UK, which closed its doors in Gainsborough December 2008.  

Dilemma

Do I wear my familiar collapsible top hat, or my “new” hat, Bert’s Bowler?

On the one hand, the collapsible hat is good for packing into a bag, ideal for these stay-over away trips & whilst not completely undefeated, has a very good record.

On the other hand, this season I’ve been wearing Bert’s Bowler, kindly gifted to me from the possessions of a County’s Supporters’ late Grandfather, Bert. Bert’s Bowler is undefeated, but has clocked up a lot of draws.

This is the quandary on which I shall meditate between now & Saturday.

As you know, you can find all of the pubs I try on the excellent CAMRA website www.whatpub.com

See you there!

Man in a Hat.